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To Relocate Or Not To Relocate?
Louise Wiles
According to JustLanded.com, currently over 200 million people worldwide are living abroad and in a recent Gallup Survey over 700 million people said that they would like to live abroad at some point in their lifetime. This is indicative of a shrinking world, one which is opening up to cross-cultural and global living on a massive scale.
But not every assignment or relocation abroad results in happy and fulfilled lives. Moving abroad does not always lead to the utopian life that many believe it might. Of course, it is impossible for everything to work out well for everyone all of the time, but there are things that people can do to improve their chances of a successful relocation and I believe that this starts with the decision-making process...
What Makes People Want to Relocate Abroad?
For some people, the decision to relocate abroad is due to a great job offer, a chance to acquire valuable international experience and/or perhaps an attractive lifestyle proposition. For others, moving (and potentially settling long-term) abroad provides a chance to escape difficult economic or political conditions in their home countries and create a brighter future.
I believe there are two forces at play: the push of negative circumstances at home, which spark a kind of 'escape' mentality; and pull – the attraction of a new life or career abroad. For most people, the motivation to move derives from a mixture of the two forces: some aspects of their current life that they would like to escape (if only for a while) and other aspects of a new life abroad that seem promising and attractive.
Some people move and never look back: relocating many times with their careers and thriving in their new environments. However for others, their experiences are not necessarily so positive.
Some find the transition challenging and although they do 'make it' in the end, they perhaps wish they had taken more time to think, prepare and plan at the beginning. For others the dream ends in disaster, leading to sad, regretful returns home which often cost them greatly in financial and emotional terms.
"How Do We Know We Are Doing The Right Thing?"
This is a question I have asked a number of times during endless relocation debates with my husband. Now, ten years on and five relocations later, I know that in truth we can never know whether the decision is/was absolutely 'right' or 'wrong'.
I have found that the better question to ask is:
"How can we know that this is the 'best decision'?"
Making the 'best decision' rather than the 'right decision' takes the pressure off in terms of 'right' or 'wrong' and emphasises the importance of finding the 'best' fit between your relocation destination and your relocation criteria.
A 'best decision' is one that is thoroughly researched and considered, leading to a confident decision, which in turn creates a positive mindset for relocation. It is a decision that is positive about the future but also open to the realities of the challenge ahead.
Making The 'Best Decision'
There is so much information now available in the media, online and offline, about countries and locations, expatriate experiences and challenges to consider, that starting the whole research process can seem totally overwhelming.
What is needed is a structure, a way of working through all the areas that need to be considered, a method for developing your relocation criteria that will then help you to narrow down and focus your search.
The series of questions below are designed to do just that. I suggest you take one question point per day and explore it thoroughly. From each main question point, then develop a list of criteria, things or aspects of life that are important to you, that you would like to find or definitely would not like to find in your new location. Prioritize this list of criteria and then your research will become much more focused: you will be really clear about what you are looking for.
1. What is Your Vision for Your Future?
Beyond the sun, sea and sangria, what are you hoping to create for your future. What do you want to have? What do you want to be? What do you want to do/achieve?
2. What is Important to You in Your Life?
Think about the things in your life that you really value. What do you always put first (or wish you put first): your family; your career; and/or your health? What values will you not compromise? What is non-negotiable?
3. What is Good About Now?
Take a look at all the areas that are relevant to you in your life right now. For example, areas such as your career, family, friends, hobbies, interests, finances, health, environment and community. Ask yourself for each area: What is good right now? What do you want to keep?
What do not mind losing?
What do you want to change and improve?
4. Your Personal Resource Centre.
This is where you work to prepare yourself mentally for relocating abroad. What personal strengths, skills, talents and resources do you possess that will help you to overcome the challenges of relocation abroad and help you to make it a real success? What is your attitude to big life change? How do feel when you need to operate outside of your comfort zone?
5. What are Your Move Abroad Criteria?
Having worked through the questions above, now write a list of what you need to have in order to be able to honor all that is written above. What does your destination location need to have in order for you to be happy?
You may not find the prefect match but at least you will be making a conscious and informed decision based on your explicit needs.
6. Research Your options Fully, Using Your Criteria Checklist as a Guide to Where You Need to Focus Your Research
Arrange inspection visits and also talk to people who live in the locations that you are investigating: if possible, expatriates and host nationals.
7. Analyse the Options
Write a list of the pros and cons for each possible option. Ask yourself the following questions for each option: What will happen if I take this option? What will not happen if I take this option? What will happen if I do not take this option?
What will not happen if I do not take this option?
8. Decision Time
Make a decision. Then ask yourself how you feel.
Excited? Inspired? Enthusiastic? A little fearful (that's normal)?
Unhappy? Unconvinced? Uncertain? Scared? If you feel like this, even after sleeping on the decision overnight, perhaps this is not the decision for you, so reconsider your decision before you end up unhappy abroad.
The Decision Process
Most importantly, enjoy the decision-making process: it should be fun and exciting – and it should help you feel sure that when you have made your decision, you have made the best possible decision at this point in time.
Living abroad is not for everyone and the result of working through a process like this may be that you find you would prefer to stay home.
I wish you all the best for your relocation decision and future life – abroad or at home! |
