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Rules Britannia
Toni Hargis
Expat Women's Interview with Toni
ExpatWomen: Toni, Rules Britannia is a truly humorous account of what non-Brits should expect if they travel in, move to and/or live in Britain. What inspired you to write the book and how easily were you able to incorporate humor into the book?
Toni: I never actually sat down to write a book. The day I moved to the States, it seemed that people started asking me for advice before a trip or a move to the UK. At first I just wrote a few tips on a piece of paper – such as “Don't say ‘fanny'!” In the States it's fairly harmless but in the UK it refers to the female front “parts”. A few years after moving to Chicago, a friend was moving to England for at least five years so I really cranked out the information for her. When I handed over about 40 pages, she said “Toni, this is a book”. She (Carla Young) was also very supportive in my efforts to keep writing and I fact-checked with her almost weekly. After about 7 years, I found myself a great agent, who in turn, got me my contract with St. Martin's Press. As far as the humour goes, it's partly how I tend to talk anyway and mainly because the differences between cultures can often be hilarious – especially when you're trying to explain them and there is no rational explanation. Why do the Brits never refer to someone standing in front of them as “he” or “she”? No idea, but don't dare try it or you might hear the response “Who's she? The cat's mother?”
ExpatWomen: You are a Brit who currently lives with your American husband and your British/American children in Chicago. Can you share with us a couple of examples that you and your husband have experienced with the different language and cultural nuances between Brits and Americans?
Toni: When they were really little they didn't seem to realize that my husband and I spoke slightly differently, and were confused when Americans didn't understand nappy and dummy (diaper and pacifier). When my oldest was about eighteen months her favourite way to wind me up was to try to say “Bloody hell” in public. It came out more like “baddyell” and people couldn't understand it when I reprimanded her! A few years later my husband was helping out at her nursery school. One of the teachers was trying to get his attention by calling his name, to no avail. My daughter went up to the teacher and gently explained, “No it's Maahk”, pronouncing Mark in a terribly English accent. My youngest is now 4 and sounds quite English. From experience I know that this might last for another year, but school and mixing with more Americans will eventually eradicate all vestiges of an English accent – except when we get back from England and then they all have the English inflection with the American accent. Sounds very weird.
ExpatWomen: Have you been finding more examples of these language and cultural nuances with the audience who has been reading your book?
Toni: Yes, many people e-mail me through the web site either to ask questions or give me an example of something they have done. This will come in very handy when I have to make updates and edits to the book. Only the other day someone reminded me that, apart from telling non Brits how to order a pint in a pub, I should also mention that it can be very dangerous to walk in front of a dart board during a game!! Something that would have been very obvious to me, but if you're not used to darts flying, you wouldn't even know to look out for them.
ExpatWomen: How long did it take you to write the book and what extra research did you need to undertake, other than that of your own social experience?
Toni: I hate to say it but the book took about 8 years to write. I wasn't really writing to a deadline, more like dashing some thoughts off once the kids were in bed. I did have a late baby and a large house move towards the end, I have to add. Since I was writing it to help people moving to the UK, I wanted to cover a lot of areas I knew they would bump into, such as what the houses are like, what it's like to drive there, how the schools work etc. A lot of things you take for granted, such as “don't drink from the taps in the bathrooms” I had to check with friends and family, and it turned out that they all had different opinions. Knowing that I couldn't write just any old thing, I then had to get my mother to call her local water company while I did a huge Internet search round other regions in the UK for the answer. Turns out it's different all over the country and also depends on how old your house is. There were many instances like this.
Warning people not to drink and drive also involved something more than just my opinion, so I researched the current laws on that. After my deadline, the pub licensing laws changed so I had to beg to be able to make a few more changes to the manuscript. Tourists can also get the 17.5% sales tax back under certain conditions, but rather than re-explain the system, I simply refer readers to the relevant government web pages.
ExpatWomen: Most expats who publish a book, tend to do so about their new country, but you've chosen to write about your ‘home' country first. Are you going to write a similar book about what to expect when you move to the United States?
Toni: Yes, I'm working on it as many people here (USA) have said they wish they could have had something like “Rules, Britannia” as a guide to the USA. However, I have to admit I'm slightly more afraid of making fun of Americans. It's okay to make fun of your own country, but no so funny when it's your adopted country. Also, because I went through so much confusion and made so many mistakes when I first moved here, I may have fallen into the trap of over explaining everything and thus boring myself, and everyone else, to tears. In the next few weeks I plan to take a large red pen to the manuscript and lighten it up somewhat. I should also probably have a glass of wine to hand when I continue writing to avoid being too serious!
ExpatWomen: Thank you very much Toni – both for the interview and for your kind donation of four copies of Rules, Britannia – An Insider's Guide to Life in the United Kingdom to four lucky ExpatWomen Members (1 August 2007 giveaway).
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