Flying With Children:
Tips From An Airline Insider
Special thanks for this article go to Sharon, an American expat mother in France and a former flight attendant for two carriers in five countries over thirteen years.
22. Installing the Car Seat
First you need to decide if you have to carry your car seat down the aisle or if you can get it down the aisles on whatever wheels you are using. If you used the stroller, you have to leave outside the aircraft so automatically you know it has to be carried. If using wheels, your seat might be too large to fit down the aisle, especially if you are seated in economy. Only the skinniest seats will make it. Remove the child and/or any carry-ons before getting on board. The seat on wheels might sail through business class but get stuck between economy seats. Even if it fits through economy seats, it might get wedged trying to get by the galley. Decide if it's just easier to carry it the whole way instead of having to stop and pick it up. Depending on the kind of wheels you are using, you may have to remove them or pick the entire thing up as one unit.
If you are carrying the car seat the whole way, it might be easier to turn it upside down in an "L" position and place it over your arm. Never carry a car seat by the internal straps that hold the child but you can use the tether strap, which is designed for this kind of stress. Some people find it easier to hold the tether strap over their back. Please be careful of the hook on the end, which could fly free and hurt someone or get caught. You may want to adjust the strap accordingly ahead of time.
Once you get to your seat, as mentioned earlier, you should be familiar with the seatbelt installation of the car seat. Have your manual handy. Remember that your seat does not have to go by a window but it can't block another passengers' access to the aisle. If there is a problem with this, immediately contact a Flight Attendant.
Most seats install better if you start with leaning the seat back. Push the button and push the seat back all the way. Then, look for the seatbelts. They often get caught on the side so make sure they are pulled all the way out. Pull the buckle (often referred to as the "female" part) to its maximum. Now thread the belt through the path of your car seat. Make sure the straps are flat. Pull the belt and lastly, put the seat back into the full upright position.
Airplane seatbelts are designed differently than those in your car so you can run into problems with the buckle placement. First, try flipping the buckle upside down to make it flatter. If that does not work, it might be a good idea to ask for a seatbelt extension. These are the belts they use for larger passengers, similar to the one the Flight Attendants use during the safety demonstration at the start of the flight. The buckle may not line up the same way as it does in the car. For example, it may fall on an awkward area on the side of the seat or the child can feel the buckle in his or her back even if this never happens in the car. The extension gives you two buckles which you can adjust and reposition as needed.
Remember to stow whatever cart you used to transport the seat either on the floor or in a closet. Please Do not place them in overhead bins as they have caused some serious injuries when other passengers have removed their things from the same bin, especially at the end of the flight.
If installing the car seat rear-facing, you may encounter objections from the person in front who then cannot recline their own seat. If there is a free seat in the row in front of you, try to install your seat behind it. I actually coordinated with those in front of us once and they were happy to cooperate. Install the seat first and have the person in front try to crank his seat back. Often, it does actually work anyway. Infant bucket-style seats are usually not a problem but "convertible" seats, those going to 40lbs. or beyond, might be more the culprit when installed facing backward. You may also encounter more problems on charter flights with very close pitches between rows.
There is a solution which I consider to be a "desperation" measure and not exactly condoned by car seat technicians (although they haven't jumped on me yet!). If it's a long flight, you may consider turning the seat forward-facing for the "cruise" portion of the flight after take-off and then turning the seat around and reinstalling it backwards for landing. In my opinion, this is not a huge safety compromise because the biggest threat in the air, unlike a car, is turbulence, not forward impact. Airplanes usually bounce up and down in turbulence and rarely jerk forwards. I would only recommend reversing the seat if you are faced with the true wrath of the passenger in front of you on a really long flight.
More and more children are wisely being kept rear-facing in cars for longer and longer to keep them safer and reducing any injuries. Some parents do not want to turn the seat forward facing in airplanes on principal because that their children are accustomed to always facing backwards. Flying is really a different situation and the only time I turned the car seat around for this reason, my child did not object when I re-installed the seat rear-facing for landing and later, she was fine facing backwards again in the car.
If your child is very young, about six months or less, you need to pay attention to the angle of the seat. Most small babies fly in infant seats and this does not apply. This is specifically if you are flying with an infant in a convertible seat which can be used to toddler hood. Sitting too straight in the forward position could restrict his or her oxygen intake and remember that the oxygen content of airplane air is already reduced. Some seats have a guide (usually a colored bent bar on the side with a small metal ball inside) to maintain the right angle for rear-facing babies. Consult the owner's manual for your seat and your child's pediatrician before opting to do this with your younger baby.
Issues, Conflicts and Disagreements Onboard
When things do not go according to plan, and you are flying with children, things can heat up even faster than if you were alone for a number of reasons.
Some issues can be avoided by asking and making requests in advance. Be sure of your seating arrangements. If your agent couldn't sort it out, contact the airline yourself, several times if necessary. Make sure you do not leave the check-in counter without confirming any bassinet, special meal and seating requests.
If it's a seating problem that hasn't been resolved before boarding, try to sort it out yourself. Passengers tend to refuse seating requests made by Flight Attendants. When they are actually talking to the inconvenienced passenger, with their little ones, it can be difficult to refuse. Once, while asking about a seat exchange myself, my son, who was in a separate seat, burst into tears. While he didn't mean to do it for dramatic effect, it was then very difficult for the other passengers to say no.
If they do trade with you, thank them profusely and do point it out to the crew. I liked to know if a passenger did a good deed and therefore made my job that much easier.
Car seat issues were covered earlier but again, try to bring paperwork to support the "case" for your seat.
You may be faced with an inexperienced crewmember, or by contrast, someone who has been flying for awhile but is not up-to-date on the rules. Safety training is usually every six months to a year so if there were changes made, either the Flight Attendant hasn't read his or her literature or has simply been on vacation, leave or maternity. Try to be patient and ask them to consult their manual. They are required to have it on board for every flight, updated and while they do not have to memorize all its contents, they should be able to find relevant information.
Ask to speak to a purser before things get heated. If you are still on the ground, it might be wiser to consult a ground agent. They can come onboard if necessary.
Try to keep things civil and remember that eventually, you have to "cooperate" with the crew in most parts of the world. This rule is taken very seriously by the airline and if things get heated, that alone could justify you are being "off-loaded". If it's very severe, especially if there's a later flight and you are flying off-season, this may be a real option so ask if you will accept this option.
More information about complaining to the airlines is found towards the end.
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