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3 Powerful Questions That Could Change Your Life
By Barbara Buffton
Ever had one of those conversations, either with other people or with yourself, that goes something like this: One day I will do what I want to do ...(write a book, travel the world, run my own business ... you fill in the blanks) or If only I had x, I could do y...?
Whenever I hear myself say things like that, I ask myself the following 3 questions:
1. What if I could do (whatever I'm putting off) now? Many of us find all kinds of excuses for not changing – just yet. It's as if we're waiting for some good fairy or equivalent to come along and do it for us. Maybe we have to wait until our lives get really unbearable before we do anything. I have a friend who desperately wants to do something else for a living but is currently 'too busy' to even think about it.
Maybe we're in our comfort zone and, of course, once we're comfy it becomes too much effort to change.
Asking yourself: 'what if I could make the change now?' causes you to really think what your life would be like if you made certain changes. If it's not a future you want just now, then that's fine. (However, you might want to ask yourself: If not now, when? How bad does it have to get before you make any changes?)
If it's a future you do want, you now need to go on to Question 2.
2. Why do I want to change things? I find it's vital to ask myself WHY want change. This provides me with the motivation to make it. I need a reminder for those moments of weakness, tiredness, apathy -you know, when 'life' just gets in the way! My reminders take many forms, such as a post-it note on my computer screen, a little note on my make-up mirror or on the fridge door. Do whatever works for you.
So I now have certainty that I want to change and I have my motivation. The next question is the one that always gets me going. Literally.
3. What's the smallest thing I can do now towards my goal? Whenever I find myself putting off doing something, I take some action, however small, towards doing it, e.g. if it's an article I need to write, I get hold of pen and paper and write down the title; if it's going to the gym, I put on my gym kit; if it's changing my life, I ask myself 'why?'. These small steps get me started on the road and once I've started, I might as well keep going. The secret is always to make each step a small one so that you don't get daunted or put off.
Before you know it, a whole series of small steps has equaled a giant one and you've made some changes.
Is this what you want? If it is, what's stopping you?
Go for it!
Barbara Buffton was a qualified careers adviser who one day decided to take her own advice and change her career! She has had four books published, including The Which? Guide to Choosing a Career (1998). Buy her latest book here...
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